最坚强的泡沫

三吋日光
梁静茹


深秋山顶风微凉
恋人并肩傻傻看夕阳
阳光 你为我敞开的天窗
一段日光落在手心三吋长

你说 秋天早上的日光
一吋能许一个愿望
希望我爱的人健康
个性很善良
大大手掌能包容我小小的倔强
你的浪漫只有我懂 欣赏
能让眼泪长出翅膀
飞离我脸庞
还想每天用咖啡香不让你赖床
周末傍晚踩着单车逛黄昏市场
我的浪漫只有你懂欣赏
就让每个台风晚上 不恐慌紧张

第三个愿望 还不想讲
你自己想一想
望微笑的月光

你说 秋天早上的日光
一吋能许一个愿望
希望我爱的人健康
个性很善良
大大手掌能包容我小小的倔强
你的浪漫只有我懂欣赏
能让眼泪长出翅膀
飞离我脸庞
还想每天用咖啡香不让你赖床
周末傍晚踩着单车逛黄昏市场
我的浪漫只有你懂欣赏
就让每个台风晚上 不恐慌紧张

一人一支闪闪仙女棒
好像我们之间有星光
安躺 可是很灿烂很漂亮
一点点光捧在手上像太阳
等到世界末日你才讲
那个愿望 一起握紧不放 

PS: 平淡生活，快乐生活！喜欢这首歌的意境的请举手！

昨天和寝室的姐妹说了两个笑话，录如下：

两只小猪的故事

一天，
小猪甲对小猪乙说：“你猜我口袋里有几块糖？”
小猪乙说：“我猜对了你会分给我吃吗？”
小猪甲：“你猜对了我两块都给你吃！”
小猪乙咽了咽口水，
说：“那就五块吧！”


醉鬼的故事

第一次，醉鬼A在墙上画了一个圈。
对醉鬼B说：“你从这里钻过去吧！”
醉鬼B照做了，把头撞伤了。
第二次，醉鬼B用手电筒往上照出一个光柱。
对醉鬼A说：“你沿着这个柱子往上爬吧！”
醉鬼A机灵的说：“我才没那么傻呢！万一我爬到中途，你把手电筒一关，我不就摔下来了！”

今天：2008年07月23日

奥运会开幕式倒计时：16天
回家倒计时：8天（暂定）
回京倒计时：30天（暂定）

另外还有什么需要倒计时呢？
算了，想不起来了，待续吧！

Mastering Your Ph.D.: Better Communication with Your Supervisor

Patricia Gosling, Bart Noordam
Germany
27 June 2008

Is poor communication with your supervisor getting in the way of your progress in the lab? Perhaps you’ve reached an impasse in your research and can’t see a way through. Or maybe it seems that--from your supervisor’s point of view--nothing you do is good enough. If you and your supervisor have different expectations of your output, and the two of you haven’t spoken in months, then a lack of communication is surely holding you back.

Once settled into their projects, many graduate students are left to work things out on their own. That’s as it should be, to a certain extent, as much of graduate training is focused on having you develop the ability to meet problems head on and solve them on your own. But your supervisor must ultimately approve your thesis, so keeping the lines of communication open is crucial. Don’t wait until you get into serious problems before knocking on your supervisor’s door. Even if your supervisor keeps her distance, as a seasoned researcher, she should be able to provide appropriate guidance, and, one hopes, a neutral perspective. Even if you feel that your supervisor tends to place his or her interests above your own, initiating communication on a regular basis will give you the opportunity to voice your concerns.

Some people are born communicators; if you aren't, and talking to your supervisor feels like talking to a wall, take heart: Good communication skills can be learned. If you’re having trouble connecting with your supervisor in a satisfying way, the key to better communication is understanding your supervisor’s personality and communication style, as well as your own. Everyone is different: Some like the free-and-easy approach; others like more structure. Either way, better communication is likely to involve planning and a conscious effort on your part. If communication with your supervisor is poor or nonexistent, and has been from the beginning, don't blame yourself. It's also not a good idea to try to change your supervisor's ways; it won’t work. Instead, focus on what you can do to improve the situation.

Does your supervisor always seem to address the lab as a whole rather than each of you as individuals with different needs, skills, and abilities? Perhaps in your weekly group meeting, she scans the room, asks, “Everything going okay? Any problems? No? Great,” and then dashes back to her office or to another meeting. This kind of behavior doesn’t make your supervisor a bad person; it may mean she is busy and perhaps insensitive to cues from lab members about the need for regular contact.

Possibly, your supervisor talks to you individually, but he’s a "hit and run" artist, tossing out a query about your progress as he breezes through the lab and then hides behind a stack of journal articles on his desk.

If your supervisor is an assistant professor just starting out, she may spend most of her time in the lab working beside you. If that’s the case, there will be many opportunities for discussions, formal and informal. And unless your supervisor is very bad at communicating, good rapport will develop naturally.

If your supervisor is established at the institution and highly regarded in her field, she may rarely appear in the lab at all. In between international conferences, she sticks her head in the door for a quick hello and may only meet with her most senior postdoc to assess the lab's progress. If this is your situation and you feel like a "worker bee," with a supervisor who is remote or hard to approach, it can be difficult to speak up and make your concerns known.

But no matter what your supervisor’s style, you can find ways to make yourself heard. The most valuable thing you can do is to make an appointment to talk face-to-face whenever you have something important to discuss. Even if you have lots of access to your supervisor and engage in many informal chats, a formal talk will allow you to structure your questions and clarify important issues. If you prepare well for the meeting, all you'll need is 15 minutes or so of your supervisor's time.

No matter how busy your supervisor is, plan to meet at least once a month--more often is even better--to discuss your research and other issues you want to address. Suggest a time of day when a meeting is likely to be most successful. Is he more focused first thing in the morning? Then make your appointment before he is swamped with other priorities. Immediately after lunch is another good time. Avoid making appointments late in the day, because they are likely to be canceled as other priorities press in and the end of the workday approaches.

Informal, spontaneous communication plays an important role in building relationships and establishing trust. Informal chats about work or other common interests can help build rapport, and the more comfortable you and your supervisor are with each other, the better. A good rapport based on trust and mutual respect can be a great asset.

It is not, however, something you can force, and you can still make progress without this kind of rapport. The most crucial form of communication takes place during regular, short, face-to-face meetings between just you and your supervisor.

Once your appointment has been set up, take time to prepare. Go to your meeting with a written list of questions and concerns. Keep them brief--no more than three issues per meeting. Be specific; it won’t do any good to ask, “So, how do you think I’m progressing?” A question like that will just encourage your supervisor to respond in general terms or say something encouraging but meaningless, or--worse--disparaging but meaningless. If you need guidance on how to move your research forward, for example, come to your meeting with two or three of your own ideas about how to proceed. Give your supervisor enough contexts to be able to provide you with helpful input. If you haven’t spoken for a while, give him a brief summary of your most recent results.

During the meeting, take notes and jot down your supervisor's suggestions, assuming it's okay with her; some people find it disconcerting to have their remarks written down. As you chat, gauge your supervisor's enthusiasm and interest by paying attention to body language and other nonverbal cues. At the end of the meeting, thank your supervisor for her time and immediately send a follow up e-mail that summarizes what you discussed. That way, you’ll have a record of your questions or concerns and your supervisor’s responses. Print out the correspondence and keep it in a file, along with your original list of "talking points," for future reference.

In addition to your face-to-face meetings, you may want to chat with your supervisor whenever the chance arises, as well as send him informal monthly updates of your progress by e-mail. Even if your supervisor is unwilling to work with you on creating a Monthly Progress Monitor, sending an e-mail at the end of every month, with a brief summary of the experiments you’ve done and results you’ve achieved, is another effective way of keeping your supervisor up-to-date on your work. But none of this should substitute for regular, short, structured meetings with an agenda you prepare. Allowing too much time to pass between structured communications may cause your research--and your relationship with your supervisor--to veer off in a direction in which it shouldn’t go.

With all the focus on structure, why bother to have a meeting? Can't it all be done by e-mail? Not really. E-mail and other electronic forms of communication are useful, but they aren't adequate. Even if you're reciting lists and focusing on facts during your face-to-face meetings, you're sending and receiving a complex set of verbal and nonverbal cues that are crucial to establishing trust, the foundation of a strong working relationship. E-mail fails to convey this crucial information. Emoticons are no substitute for real emotions. Meeting frequently and regularly with your supervisor, asking relevant questions, and documenting her input will increase the probability that good communication flows in both directions and that your research is in line with what your supervisor wants and expects.

Learning good communication skills in an unstructured environment can be a challenge. But fostering effective communication with a supervisor is a skill that will serve you well throughout your career, particularly if he or she is a poor communicator or difficult to approach. Even if you become an independent entrepreneur without a boss, you will surely have clients and colleagues who will benefit immensely from your ability to communicate well.

 

Mastering Your Ph.D.: Getting the Most Out of Progress Reviews

Bart Noordam, Patricia Gosling
Netherlands
28 September 2007

You will meet with your supervisor from time to time to present data, exchange ideas, and discuss failures and possible solutions for moving forward with your thesis research. These regular discussions are keys to your success as a Ph.D. student. Below we provide tips and tricks to ensure you get the most out of these meetings.

Some supervisors are easygoing and will regularly check in with you to ask how things are coming along. You probably wouldn't even think of such an encounter as a progress review. Other supervisors are more organized and want to discuss progress in scheduled meetings. Finally, there is the hands-off supervisor who believes that you should figure it all out for yourself; only if you push hard will this type of supervisor be able to discuss your achievements and how you should move forward. Irrespective of which type of supervisor you have--whether they're formal or not--you should prepare for these meetings. As a rule of thumb, your preparation time should be about as long as the meeting itself.

Start by thinking about what you want to get out of the meeting and writing down your current challenges. Perhaps your samples aren't as good as you had hoped, and you need guidance on what to do next. Maybe you need feedback on an abstract you've prepared for an upcoming meeting, or you gave your supervisor a manuscript to review weeks ago and haven't seen it since. It is unlikely that you will be able to solve all these problems in a single meeting, so prioritize those that your supervisor will be able to help you with. Pick, at most, three topics you want to discuss at the meeting and be clear about the type of solution you want. For instance, bring up the manuscript that is still on your supervisor's desk. Aim to set a date for a meeting to discuss the manuscript (thereby implying that your supervisor will have looked at it by then). You might even want to bring a list of these discussion points to the meeting.

In discussions such as progress reviews, we tend to focus on activities that we feel we need to do but that aren't going that well. We ask for more attention, a quicker response, better equipment, more conference visits, and so on. It is important to express your needs but ensure that you also pay attention to two other categories of activities.

First, to accomplish more of the things on your to-do list, make sure there is also a stop-doing list. Discuss with your supervisor the activities you want to spend less time on, and why. For instance, coordinating the weekly group meetings has been a good experience, but now that you are wrapping up your thesis it might be time for someone else to take over this task.

Second, confirm what's working well. Note the activities that you want to continue doing. Praise your supervisors for contributions you've found helpful. For instance, if your supervisor returns a manuscript to you promptly, let her know you appreciate that. Everybody likes a compliment, including supervisors.

Progress reviews are serious business, but there's more going on in these meetings than the agenda. Another objective is to build rapport with your adviser. Allow time for some informal chitchat. Depending on your relationship, a bit of humor can make the discussion more relaxed.

You go into the meeting well prepared, anticipating a fruitful outcome. Then your supervisor starts haranguing you and listing all kinds of things that have gone wrong. Most of the accusations are new, or they've never been mentioned in such an explicit way before. It is clear that your supervisor is not a great communicator, but that is of little help now. It's likely that your supervisor has saved up these criticisms for an occasion like this meeting, determined to vent them all at once, even if they're no longer relevant. You start to argue. Your supervisor is not in the mood to argue and hardly listens. The list of complaints grows longer.

Here is a survival strategy. First, forget your agenda. It's unlikely that you'll make progress on the points you planned to discuss once the meeting takes such a negative turn. Second, listen, don't argue, then summarize the accusations and repeat them back. This demonstrates that you're taking them seriously. Finally, try to set up a new meeting to deal with the lists of complaints. Emotions are running too high to allow you to transform complaints into actionable solutions right away. Take the haranguing seriously but remember that, following the tirade, your supervisor may feel relieved. From his perspective the air has been cleared and your collaboration has regained energy.

Most meetings, however, go more smoothly. You make it through your agenda and everything on your agenda has been discussed. But there's one more issue that you want to raise but are afraid to ask, so you put it off to the end. Bringing up a major concern at the end of a meeting is not the best or most effective method, but at least you had the guts to do it. Next time, deal with the important stuff earlier, even if it's awkward and unpleasant.

Here's something that happens often, but you should do your best to avoid it: You walk out of the meeting thinking it was fruitful only to realize later that little progress was made in creating practical solutions. The two of you agreed that you should spend more time getting better samples--but what should you do tomorrow morning? Keep the discussion focused on solid, achievable action points. You may have to adjust them later, but defining an actionable plan is the next essential step toward success.

Value these moments of interaction with your supervisor. They may be chaotic, infrequent, interrupted by others, and sometimes a little more critical than you would wish. But if you are well-prepared, those meetings will make a magnificent contribution to achieving your main goal, the completion of your Ph.D.

新版红楼不伦不类的造型陆续公布，看着真让人生气，真不明白他为什么挑战这个经典。
挑战也就罢了，也不要一开始就弄得人人反胃啊！最讨厌他们的新发型了！唉！
下面是网络上流传的针对新造型恶搞的经典台词，很是搞笑。看这娱乐效果，新版也总算做了那么一点“贡献”呀！呵呵

	贾母急得道：孽障！你想魔幻，要武侠剧容易，何苦改那命根子红楼梦！     宝玉道：家里姐姐妹妹都像白蛇传，单我像西门大官人，我说没趣，如今来了这么一个神仙似的妹妹也打扮得小青一样！	薛姨妈道：这是宫里的新鲜样法，拿纱堆的花儿十二支。      周瑞家道：留着给宝丫头吧，又想着她们做什么。     薛姨妈道：姨娘不知，宝丫头古怪着呢，满头都是叶大师设计的铜钱，从不爱花儿粉儿的。
	黛玉问道：叶大师设计这铜钱头和窗帘布是单我一个人，还是别的姑娘们都有呢？     周瑞家的道：别的姑娘都有了，这幅铜钱纱帘是姑娘的。     黛玉冷笑道：我就知道，不挑剩下最恶心的也不给我啊。	贾政道：名为红楼梦容易，再做一首诗来。     宝玉便念道：《新版<红楼梦>印象》：楼是灰的，屋是灰的，床是灰的，地是灰的，在一片死灰之中，走过两个娘子，一个死白，一个惨绿。
	贾母笑道：这些设计大师都是一个套子，左不过是些舞台贴片子改装，最没趣。把人家好好小姑娘画得像个鬼，还说是艺术，编得连影儿都没有了。开口都是国际大师，不是得了这个大奖就是那个大奖。	贾母因问：袭人怎么头上也贴了铜钱？她如今也有些拿大了，李导不是都说了咱大观园只有小姐太太才能用铜钱的？     王夫人忙起身道：这铜钱是叶大师特许的，和姨娘们一样。